Joseph Weinberg & Associates ~ Educational Consultants

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Bibliography

Joseph Weinberg & Associates
Selected, Incomplete Suggested Reading List

  • Male Survivors
  • Menstruation
  • Sexuality
  • Radical Feminism
  • Pornography
  • Sports
  • Witches
  • Language
  • Fraternity/Military
  • How Boys Become Men
  • Changing Men
  • Raising Boys
  • Self Defense
  • Power Imbalance in Relationships
  • Race and Gender and SA
  • Religion
  • Rape 101
  • Creation of Femininity
  • History of Gender
  • Heroes/Dreamers
  • Hetero/Homo
  • Adolescent Sexuality

ESPECIALLY FOR MALE SURVIVORS
Most of these books focus on male survivors. My work has primarily been with boys and men. Most of the books on recovery from incest and other sexual assault have been written by and for women, though many male survivors have used these resources and received emotional sustenance from them. As in much of abuse/rape/sexual assault and related areas, women have long provided leadership and direction. I include the books by Laura Davis, a wonderful pioneer. She writes for females and males.

  1. Bolton, Frank G; Morris, L. and MacEachron, A., Males at Risk: The Other Side of Child Sexual Abuse, Sage Pubs., 1989
  2. Boyle, Patrick, Scout's Honor: Sexual Abuse in America's Most Trusted Institution, Prima Publishing, 1994
  3. Davis, Laura, The Courage to Heal, Harper & Row, 1990
  4. Davis, Laura, Allies in Healing: When the Person You Love Was Sexually Abused as a Child, HarperCollins Publishers, 1991
  5. Hunter, Mic, Abused Boys The Neglected Victims of Sexual Abuse, Fawcett Columbine, 1990
  6. Hunter, Mic, The Sexually Abused Male Vol. 1: Prevalence, Impact, & Treatment, Lexington Books, 1990
  7. Hunter, Mic, The Sexually Abused Male Vol. 2: Application of Treatment Strategies, Lexington Books, 1990
  8. Lew, Mike, Victims No Longer Men Recovering From Incest And Other Sexual Child Abuse, Harper Row, 1990
  9. Mendel, Matthew, The Male Survivor: The Impact of Sexual Abuse, Sage, 1995
  10. Sanders, Timothy, Male Survivors: 12-Step Recovery Program , Crossing Press, 1991
  11. Scarce, Michael, Male On Male Rape: The Hidden Toll of Stigma and Shame, Insight Books, 1997
  12. Thomas, T., Men Surviving Incest: A Male Survivor Shares the Process of Recovery, Launch Press, 1989
  13. Windling, Terri, ed., The Armless Maiden: And Other Tales for Childhood's Survivors, Tor Books, 1995

MENSTRUATION
An important part of the discussion of the lives of males and females is learning how to understand and celebrate our bodies. For generations, males have been taught “menstrual phobia.” Out of ignorance and fear, many males have colluded in traumatizing girls and women about this natural fact of biology. These books have been helpful to many females and males.

  1. Delaney, Janice; Lupton, M.J. and Toth, E., The Curse: A Cultural History of Menstruation, University of Illinois Press, 1988
  2. Grahn, Judy, Blood, Bread and Roses: How Menstruation Created the World, Beacon Press, 1993
  3. Houppert, Karen, The Curse: Confronting the Last Unmentionable Taboo: Menstruation, Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 1999
  4. Shuttle, Penelope and Redgrove, Peter, The Wise Wound: Myths, Realities, and Meanings of Menstruation, Grove Press, 1986
  5. Taylor, Dena, Red Flower: Rethinking Menstruation, The Crossing Press, 1988

SEXUALITY
For hundreds of years, sexuality has been feared, misrepresented and punished. As a result, the models of female and male sexuality available to us now are deeply flawed. Generation after generation of childrens' natural sexual impulses have been thwarted. There have always been some people brave enough to proudly explore sexuality. Here are some books that I have found helpful in identifying and unlearning the body-hate and sex-hate so prevalent in our culture.

Abbott, Franklin, ed., Men & Intimacy: Personal Accounts Exploring the Dilemmas of Male Sexuality, The Crossing Press, 1990
Blank, Joani, ed., Femalia, Down There Press, 1993
Blank, Joani, ed., First Person Sexual: Women & Men Write About Self-Pleasuring, Down There Press, 1996
Cline, Sally, Women, Passion & Celibacy, Carol Southern Books, 1993
De Beer, Hugh & Kemp, Al, Foreplay, Forerunner Production, 1997
D'Emilio, John and Freedman, Estelle B., Intimate Matters: A History of Sexuality in America, Harper and Row, 1988
Eisler, Riane, Sacred Pleasure: Sex, Myth, and the Politics of the Body, HarperSanFrancisco, 1995
Ensler, Eve, The Vagina Monologues, Villard, 1998
Federation of Feminist Women's Health Centers, A New View of a Woman's Body, Feminist Health Press, 1995
Giles, Fiona, ed., Dick For A Day: What Would You Do If You Had One?, Villard Books, 1997
Grosz, Elizabeth and Probyn, Elspeth, Sexy Bodies: The Strange Carnalities of Feminism, Routledge, 1995
Heart, Mikaya, When the Earth Moves: Women and Orgasm, Celestial Arts, 1998
Levins, Hoag, American Sex Machines: The Hidden History of Sex at the U.S. Patent Office, Adams Media Corporation, 1996
Margulis, Lynn and Sagan, Dorion, Mystery Dance: On the Evolution of Human Sexuality., Simon & Schuster, 1991
McGill, Michael E., The McGill Report on Male Intimacy, Harper & Row Publishers, 1985
Muscio, Inga, Cunt: A Declaration of Independence, Seal Press, 1998
Paley, Maggie, The Book of the Penis, Grove Press, 1999
Parsons, Alexandra, Facts & Phalluses: A Collection of Bizarre and Intriguing Truths, Legends, and Measurements, St. Martin's, 1990
Rimmer, Robert, Let's Really Make Love: Sex, The Family, and Education in the 21st Century, Prometheus Books, 1995
Selkirk, Errol, Erotica for Beginners, Writers and Readers Publishing, Inc., 1991
Sky, Michael, Sexual Peace: Beyond the Dominator Virus, Bear & Company, Inc., 1993
Smith, Dave and Gordon, Mike, Strange But True Facts About Sex, Meadowbrook Press
Snitow, Ann; Stansell, Christine and Thompson, S., Powers of Desire: The Politics of Sexuality, Monthly Review Press, 1983
Spadola, Meema, Breasts: Our Most Public Private Parts, Wildcat Canyon Press, 1998
Stubbs, Kenneth & Chansen, C., The Clitoral Kiss: A Fun Guide to Oral Sex, Oral Massage, & Other Oral Delights, Secret Garden, 1993
Stahl, Sam, Men and Mating, Selph Press, 1992
Tiefer, Leonore, Sex is Not a Natural Act and Other Essays, Westview Press, 1995
Vance, Carole S., ed., Pleasure and Danger: Exploring Female Sexuality, Routledge and Kegan Paul, 1984
Yalom, Marilyn, A History of the Breast, Alfred A. Knopf, Inc., 1997
Zilbergeld, Bernie with the assistance of Ullman, John, Male Sexuality: A Guide to Sexual Fulfillment, Bantam Books, 1981

RADICAL FEMINISM
Both the phrases “radical” and “feminism” have been demonized and flagrantly misrepresented. To me, these are both positive phrases. It shouldn't have to be radical to insist on equality and safety for women. It is a sad commentary that these and other women have been marginalized for their willingness to insist that the “emperor has no clothes.” These books have all been very important in my development as a anti-violence activist.

Adams, Carol J., The Sexual Politics of Meat: A Feminist-Vegetarian Critical Theory, Continuum Publishing Company, 1990
Caputi, Jane, The Age of Sex Crime, Bowling Green State University Popular Press, 1987
Chesler, Phyllis, About Men, Simon & Schuster, 1978
DiMassa, Diane, Hothead Paisan: Homicidal Lesbian Terrorist & Revenge of Hothead Paisan, Cleis Press, 1993, 1995
Dworkin, Andrea, Our Blood, Perigee Books, 1976
Dworkin, Andrea, Intercourse, The Free Press, 1987
Johnson, Sonia, From Housewife to Heretic, Anchor Books, 1983
Johnson, Sonia, Going Out Of Our Minds: The Metaphysics of Liberation, The Crossing Press, 1987
Johnson, Sonia, Wildfire: Igniting the She/Volution, Wildfire Books, 1989
Johnson, Sonia, Telling The Truth, The Crossing Press, 1987
Johnson, Sonia, The Ship That Sailed Into the Living Room: Sex and Intimacy Reconsidered, Wildfire Books, 1991
Juno, Andrea & Vale, V., eds., RE/Search #13: Angry Women, Andrea Juno & V. Vale, 1991

PORNOGRAPHY
Pornography is a very loaded topic. Something that occurs to me, and I don't think this has been explored sufficiently yet, that in our sex-hating culture pornography serves as default sex-education. Broadly speaking, for me the problem is not nudity but is all of the violent, furtive, coercive elements that have been grafted onto nudity.

Brooks, Gary, Centerfold Syndrome: How Men Can Overcome Objectification & Achieve Intimacy With Women, Jossey-Bass, 1995
Carter, Angela, The Sadeian Woman and the Ideology of Pornography, Harper Colophon, 1978
Caught Looking: Feminism, Pornography & Censorship, Caught Looking, Inc., 1986
Dworkin, Andrea, Pornography: Men Possessing Women, Perigee Books, 1981
Keefe, Tim, Some of My Best Friends are NAKED: Interviews with seven Erotic Dancers, Barbary Coast Press, 1993
Kimmel, Michael, ed., Men Confront Pornography, Crown, 1990

SPORTS
The problem is not sports, the problem is how sports is a major source of destructive messages to boys and men about what constitutes a Real Man. Athletes that assault do not assault because of their participation in sports. The following authors and others provide a valuable service, examining the shadow-side of sports, suggesting how we can confront and change the abusive aspects of sports. 

Benedict, Jeff, Public Heroes, Private Felons: Athletes and Crimes Against Women, Northeastern University Press, 1997
Benedict, Jeff and Yeager, D., Pros and Cons: The Criminals Who Play in the NFL, Warner Publishing, 1998
Bissinger, H.G., Friday Night Lights A Town, A Team, and A Dream, Harper Perennial, 1990
Hoberman, John, Darwin's Athletes: How Sport Has Damaged Black America/Preserved The Myth of Race, Houghton Mifflin, 1997
Messner, Michael & Sabo, Donald, Sex, Violence & Power in Sports: Rethinking Masculinity, Crossing Press, 1994
Nelson, Mariah Burton, The Stronger Women Get, The More Men Love Football, Harcourt Brace, 1994
Pronger, Brian, The Arena of Masculinity: Sports, Homosexuality, and the Meaning of Sex, St. Martin's Press, 1990
Reid, Elwood, If I Don't Six, DoubleDay, 1998
Thompson, Charles & Sonnenschein, A., Down and Dirty: The Life & Crimes of Oklahoma Football, Carroll & Graf, 1990

WITCHES
Not 500 years ago, organized religion led a prolonged, horrific campaign against the female spirit. As we examine the charges of witchcraft now, we can see the hate and fear of non-conforming females and males that was the real motivation for the murders. The orgy of vehemence and bloodlust that many joined in on, slaughtering their innocent neighbors, echoes down the ages and stands as a warning to “uppity” women and men. These witches, women and men, are heroes. They were martyred by those acting out of the same spirit of hate and fear of “the female” that still exists in an only slightly more sophisticated form today.

Barstow, Anne, Witchcraze: A New History of the European Witch Hunts, Pandora c/o Harper Collins, 1994
Karlsen, Carol, The Devil in the Shape of a Woman Witchcraft in Colonial New England, Vintage Books, 1989
Kramer, Heinrich and Sprenger, James, Malleus Maleficarum, Bracken Books, London, 1996
Kunze, Michael, Highroad to the State: A Tale of Witchcraft, University of Chicago Press, 1981

LANGUAGE
I love language: I love the history of it, I love the study of it. Through their control of language, the mainstream media “sanitizes” and helps render invisible many crucial elements of the lives of real people. I find dictionaries of slang to be invaluable resources, revealing exactly what people really think and feel. These books catalogue and explicate real people's more honest language. What's revealed is often ugly, but this ugliness can help direct us to attitudes which need to change. Facing the hate of women and sexuality embedded in language for example, can help us stop denying and sugar-coating the problem(s). 

Allan, Keith & Burridge, K., Euphemism & Dysphemism: Language Used as Shield and Weapon, Oxford University Press, 1991
Aman, Reinhold, Opus Maledictorium: A Book of Bad Words, Marlowe & Company, 1996
Aman, Reinhold, ed., Talking Dirty: A Bawdy Compendium of Colorful Language, Insults and Wicked Jokes, Carol & Graff, 1994
Beale, Paul, ed., Partridge's Concise Dictionary of Slang and Unconventional (From the Work of Eric Partridge), Macmillan, 1989
Bierce, Ambrose, The Devil's Dictionary, The World Publishing Company, 1944
Cole, William and Phillips, Louis, Sex: Even More Fun You Can Have Without Laughing, Castle Books, 1997
Daly, Mary with Caputi, J., Webster's First New Intergalactic Wickedary of the English Language, The Women's Press, 1987
Dooling, Richard, Blue Streak: Swearing, Free Speech, and Sexual Harassment, Random House, 1996
Dunn, Jerry, Idiom Savant: Slang As It Is Slung, Henry Holt and Company, 1997
Farmer, J.S. & W.E. Henley, Slang and Its Analogues, Arno Press, 1970
Ferraro, Susan, Sweet Talk: The Language of Love, Simon & Schuster, 1994
Goldenson, Robert and Anderson, Kenneth, The Wordsworth Dictionary of Sex, Wordsworth Editions Ltd., 1994
Hughes, Geoffrey, Swearing: A Social History of Foul Language, Oaths and English, The Penguin Group, 1998
Hurford, Christopher, Erotic Verse, Carroll & Graf Publishers, Inc., 1996
McKenzie, Carole, Quotable Sex, St. Martin's Press, 1994
Neaman, Judith S. and Silver, Carole G., The Wordsworth Book of Euphemism, Wordsworth Editions, 1995
Olive, David, GenderBabble: The Dumbest Things Men Ever Said About Women, The Putnam Publishing Group, 1993
Richter, Alan, Sexual Slang: A Compendium of Offbeat Words And Colorful From Shakespeare to Today, HarperPerennial, 1995
Sperling, Susan Kelz, Lost Words of Love, Clarkson Potter/Publishers, 1993
Starr, Tama, The “Natural Inferiority” of Women: Outrageous Pronouncements by Misguided Males, Poseidon Press, 1991
Starr, Tama, Eve's Revenge: Saints, Sinners, and Stand-Up Sisters on the Extinction of Men, Harcourt Brace & Company, 1994
Winokur, Jon, ed., A Curmudgeon's Garden of Love, The Penguin Group, 1991

FRATERNITIES/MILITARY
Fraternities and the military along with other traditionally all-male environments have historically used violence against males as a way of teaching the ethic of violence against females. The initiation rites, hazing, blood-pinning and other abuses which can include sexual humiliation and assault, teach the theory and practice of hierarchy and abuse of others. Fraternity or military need not be synonymous with rape. Males together are not the problem (though the effort expended by males to exclude women from traditionally all-male environments is certainly a problem). It should be the abusive behavior of many males within these environments that provides the impetus for positive change to those presently committed to these institutions. Caring males in fraternities, in the military, and in other previously all-male environments can (and should) continue to push for change. I support them.

Francke, Linda Bird, Ground Zero: The Gender Wars in the Military, Simon & Schuster, 1997
Gibson, James William, Warrior Dreams: Violence and Manhood in Post-Vietnam America, Hill and Wang, 1994
Griffin, Susan, A Chorus of Stones: The Private Life of War, Anchor, Double Day, 1992
Grossman, Dave, Lt. Col., On Killing: The Psychological Cost of Learning to Kill in War and Society, Little, Brown, 1995
Office of the Inspector General, The Tailhook Report: The Official Inquiry into the Events of ë91, St. Martin's Press, 1993
Pfeil, Fred, White Guys: Studies in Postmodern Domination & Difference, Verso, 1995
Sanday, Peggy Reeves, Fraternity Gang Rape Sex, Brotherhood, and Privilege on Campus, NYU Press, 1990
Wolfe, Linda, Wasted: The Preppie Murder, Simon and Schuster, 1989
Zimmerman, Jean, Tailspin: Women at War in the Wake of Tailhook, Bantam Doubleday Dell, 1995

HOW BOYS BECOME MEN: CREATION OF MASCULINITY
Some males insist that boys are poorly initiated. To me it's not that we were poorly initiated as boys, but that we were initiated too well though certainly not the way we could have been by some truly wise, caring, gentle, loving, humorous father. We have grown up to be the men that patriarchy needs and forces us to be ”real men,” angry at and frightened of women, other men and ourselves. Oh, we are brilliantly, coldly efficiently initiated! We are initiated by our fathers and brothers with the same scarring, humiliating rites that they experienced.

Badinter, Elisabeth, XY: On Masculine Identity, Columbia University Press, 1995
Beneke, Timothy, Men on Rape, St. Martin's Press, 1982
Berger, Maurice; Wallis Brian & Watson, Simon, ed., Constructing Masculinity, Routledge, 1995
Everitt, David and Schecheter, Harold, The Manly Handbook, Berkeley Books, 1982
Feirstein, Bruce, Real Men Don't Eat Quiche, Simon & Schuster, 1982
Gerzon, Mark, A Choice of Heroes: The Changing Face of American Manhood, Houghton Mifflin, 1982
Jeffords, Susan, The Remasculinization of America: Gender and the Vietnam War, Indiana University Press, 1989
Jeffords, Susan, Hard Bodies Hollywood Masculinity in the Reagan Era, Rutgers University Press, 1994
Lefkowitz, Bernard, Our Guys: The Glen Ridge Rape and the Secret Life of the Perfect Suburb, University of California Press, 1997
Miedzian, Myriam, Boys Will Be Boys Breaking The Link Between Masculinity and Violence, Doubleday, 1991
Miles, Rosalind, The Rites of Man: Love, Sex and Death in the Making of the Male, HarperCollins Publishers, 1991
Pearson, Carol, The Hero Within: Six Archetypes We Live By, Harper & Row, 1986
Pleck, Joseph H. and Sawyer, Jack, Men and Masculinity, Prentice-Hall, 1974
Rall, Ted, My War With Brian, Nantier, Beall, Minoustchine Publishing, 1998
Simpson, Mark, Male Impersonators Men Performing Masculinity, Routledge, 1994

CHANGING MEN
Within men's culture, there is, as of yet, insufficient pressure exerted by males on males to change. For too many of our brothers and sons, “It [masculinity] ain't broke, why fix it?” Much of males' behavior is predicated on the expectations of other males (whether these expectations have been enunciated or not). We must break the cycle of negative reinforcement where the silence of good men seemingly grants tacit approval to even the most egregious behavior of other males and replace it with men taking responsibility for their own behavior and insisting on the same from other men.

Abbott, Franklin (ed.), New Men, New Minds Breaking Male Traditions, The Crossing Press, 1987
Bolen, Jean Shinoda, Gods In Everyman: A New Psychology of Men's Live & Loves, Harper & Row Publishers, 1990
Brod, Harry, A Mensch Among Men Explorations In Jewish Masculinity, The Crossing Press, 1988
Buchwald, Emilie, P. Fletcher, M. Roth, eds., Transforming A Rape Culture, Milkweed Editions, 1993
Druck, Ken with Simmons, James C., The Secrets Men Keep, Doubleday & Company, 1985
Ehrenreich, Barbara, The Hearts of Men: American Dreams and the Flight From Commitment, Anchor Press/Doubleday, 1983
Jastrab, Joseph & Schaumburg, R., Sacred Manhood, Sacred Earth: A Vision Quest Into The A Man's Heart, HarperCollins, 1994
Jenkins, Alan, Invitations to Responsibility: Therapeutic Engagement Of Men Who Are Violent And Abusive, Dulwich Center Pubs., 1990
Kimmel, Michael & Mosmiller, Thomas, ed., Against the Tide: Pro-Feminist Men in the United States, 1776-1990: A Documentary History, Beacon Press, 1992
Kivel, Paul, Men's Work: How to Stop the Violence That Tears Our Lives, Ballantine Books, 1992
Kupers, Terry, Revisioning Men's Lives: Gender, Intimacy, and Power, Guilford Press, 1993
Nowinski, Joseph, Hungry Hearts: On Men, Intimacy, Self-Esteem, and Addiction, Lexington Books, 1993
Stoltenberg, John, Refusing To Be A Man: Essays on Sex and Justice, The Penguin Group, 1989
Stoltenberg, John, The End of Manhood: A Book For Men of Conscience, Plume, 1993

RAISING BOYS
For many generations it was (and continues to be) felt that boys were easier to raise than girls. But this is based on outmoded, and often neglectful, “hands-off” methods of raising boys. Recently, there's been much interest in examining how to raise boys differently. Some “experts” use this as a way of bashing women, saying: “Women can't initiate boys into manhood.” Good mothers are not second-best. I suggest that the rearing of boys (and girls) in the past was foisted on mothers who acted in the vacuum left by generations of fathers who, admittedly laboring under the burden of their own fathers' parenting insufficiencies, abdicated and avoided. Boys need loving direction from loving adults. Dedicating ourselves to a more active, engaged parenting and educating style with boys without this serving as a new excuse to again neglect girls is a beautiful thing. 

Caron, Ann F., Strong Mothers, Strong Sons: Raising Boys in the 90's, Henry Holt and Company, 1994
Gurian, Michael, The Wonder of Boys, Tarcher/Putnam, 1996
Kindlon, Dan and Thompson, Michael, Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys, Ballantine Books, 1999
Osherson, Samuel, Finding Our Fathers: The Unfinished Business of Manhood, The Free Press, 1986
Phillips, Angela, The Trouble With Boys: A Wise and Sympathetic Guide To Raising Sons, Basic Books, 1994
Shapiro, Jerrold Lee, The Measure of A Man: Becoming The Father You Wish Your Father Had Been, Delacourt, 1993
Silverstein, Olga and Rashbaum, Beth, The Courage to Raise Good Men, The Penguin Group, 1994
Thompson, Doug, As Boys Become Men: Learning New Male Roles A Curriculum Exploring Male Role Stereotyping, Irvington, 1985

SELF-DEFENSE
A female friend was telling me about a self-defense course she was taking. She said, “You know Joe, I couldn't take self-defense seriously until I could imagine that it was your head I was poking the eyes out of instead of a stuffed dummy that we used in class.” “Do we have some issues we need to talk about?” I asked. “No, no,” she said, “ it's just that for me imagining myself fighting-back against an anonymous stranger was easy, too theoretical. It was only when I could imagine defending myself against someone that I knew that self-defense started to become valuable for me.”

Adams, Caren; Fay, J. & Loreen-Martin, J., NO is not enough: Helping Teenagers Avoid Sexual Assault, Impact Publ., 1985
Ault, Amber, Self-Defense for Gay, Lesbian, and Bi People, Ohio State University Press
Bart, Pauline and O'Brien, Patricia, Stopping Rape: Successful Strategies, Pergamon Press, 1985
Powell, Elizabeth, Talking Back to Sexual Pressure, CompCare Publishers, 1991

SEX WITHIN POWER-IMBALANCED RELATIONSHIPS IS ASSAULT
Before the activism of feminists 20-30 years ago, rape in marriage was not illegal. Neither was “sex” between doctors and their patients, therapists and their clients, teachers and their students, lawyers and their clients. As a society, we are finally recognizing the power imbalance(s) implicit in these relationships which render consent impossible. Instead of winking knowingly about the motivation of the younger female partner (victim?) we are finally examining the motivation of the older male partner (perpetrator). After a lecture I presented in his class, a male college professor asked me “Do you speak to high school girls as well as boys?” “Yes,” I replied. “I envy you,” he said, “all that teenage pussy.” “As a sexual fantasy, that is immoral for a man in your position. To act on it would be illegal,” I replied.

Dusky, Lorraine, Still Unequal: The Shameful Truth About Women and Justice in America, Crown Publishers, 1996
Finkelhor, David and Yllo, Kersti, License to Rape: Sexual Abuse of Wives, Holt, Rinehart and Winston, 1985
Malcolm, Janet, In The Freud Archives, Vintage Books, 1983
Masson, Jeffrey, Freud: The Assault on Truth Freud's Suppression of the Seduction Theory, Faber & Faber, 1984
Masson, Jeffrey, A Dark Science: Women, Sexuality, and Psychiatry in the Nineteenth Century, Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 1986
Mendelsohn, Robert S., Male Practice: How Doctors Manipulate Women, Contemporary Books, Inc., 1982
O'Brien, Darcy, Power to Hurt: Inside a Judge's Chambers: Sexual Assault, and the Ultimate Reversal of Justice for Women, HarperCollins Publishers, 1996
Russell, Diana E, Rape in Marriage, Colliers Books, 1990
Rutter, Peter, M.D., Sex In The Forbidden Zone, Jeremy Tarcher, Inc., 1989
Sanday, Peggy Reeves, A Woman Scorned: Acquaintance Rape On Trial, Doubleday, 1996
Schulhofer, Stephen J., Unwanted Sex, Harvard University Press, 1998
Trumpi, Pauline, Doctors Who Rape: Malpractice and Misogyny, Schenkman Books, 1997

RACE AND GENDER, SEXUAL ASSAULT
Examining issues of race, gender, class is crucial to understanding sexual assault. Some of the writings by the following authors have had very positive effects on my understanding of sexual assault. I am offended when I go to bookstores and find literature by some of my favorite authors “clumped” into little ghettos. I resent being forced by bookstores to ask the question: Is a book whose author is African-American an African-American book? The rest of the shelves in the bookstores are not identified as “white.”

Anzald?a, Gloria, ed., Making Face, Making Soul: Creative and Critical Perspectives by Feminists of Color, Aunt Lute Books, 1990
Brown, Elaine, A Taste of Power: A Black Woman's Story, Pantheon, 1992
Cleage, Pearl, Deals With the Devil and Other Reasons to Riot, Ballantine Books, 1993
Davis, Angela Y., Women, Race and Class, Vintage Books, 1983
Davis, Angela Y., Violence Against Women and the Ongoing Challenge to Racism, Kitchen Table: Women of Color Press, 1985
Davis, Angela Y., Blues Legacies and Black Feminism: Gertrude “Ma” Rainey, Bessie Smith & Billie Holiday, Pantheon, 1998
Golden, Thelma, Black Male: Representations of Masculinity in Contemporary American Art, Whitney/Abrams, 1994
hooks, bell, Feminist Theory: From Margin to Center, South End Press, 1984
hooks, bell, Talking Back: Thinking Feminist, Thinking Black, South End Press, 1989
hooks, bell, Black Looks: Race and Representation, South End Press, 1992
hooks, bell, Outlaw Culture: Resisting Representations, Routledge, 1994
hooks, bell, Killing Rage, Ending Racism, Henry Holt And Company, 1995
Morrison, Toni, ed., Race-ing Justice, En-gendering Power: Essays on Anita Hill, Thomas, and the Construction of Social Reality, Pantheon, 1992
Pierce-Baker, Charlotte, Surviving the Silence: Black Women's Stories of Rape, W. W. Norton, 1998

RELIGION
For thousands of years, fundamentalists have vied with one another to create systems to control and techniques to maim female sexuality and spirit. Most males, I believe, don't fare any better in those systems. We may have the privilege to do what we want and be able to get away with it with impunity. But deeply, at a basic, human level, we are diminished and our souls aggrieved.

Condren, Mary, The Serpent and the Goddess: Women, Religion, and Power in Ireland, HarperSanFrancisco, 1989
Eisler, Riane, The Chalice & The Blade: Our History, Our Future, Harper and Row Publishers, 1988
Gaylor, Annie Laurie, Betrayal of Trust: Clergy Abuse of Children, Freedom From Religion Foundation, Inc., 1988
Imbens, Annie and Jonker, Ineke, Christianity and Incest, Fortress Press, 1992
Ranke-Heinemann, Uta, Putting Away Childish Things, Harper San Francisco, 1992
Ranke-Heinemann, Uta, Eunuchs for the Kingdom of Heaven-Women, Sexuality & the Catholic Church, Doubleday, 1990

RAPE 101
These are basic, crucial texts. This is not meant as “faint praise.” These provide a foundation of understanding that other books can build upon.

Benedict, Helen, Virgin or Vamp: How the Press Covers Sex Crimes, Oxford University Press, 1992
Griffin, Susan, Rape: The Politics of Consciousness, Harper & Row, 1986
Levy, Barrie, ed., Dating Violence: Young Women in Danger, The Seal Press, 1991
McShane, Claudette, Warning! Dating may be Hazardous to your health!, Mother Courage Press, 1988
Nathan, Debbie & Snedeker, Michael, Satan's Silence: Ritual Abuse and the Making of a Modern Witch Hunt, BasicBooks, 1995
Scully, Diana, Understanding Sexual Violence: A Study of Convicted Rapists, Perspectives on Gender, Volume 3, Unwin Hyman.
Warshaw, Robin, I Never Called It Rape The MS Report on Acquaintance Rape, Harper and Row, 1988

CREATION OF FEMININITY
I appreciate that feminism was the first systematic tool of analysis that didn't have Men at its heart. What a valuable, radical gift feminism's foremothers gave us by consciously choosing to study women. Choosing to focus on women was twisted in the media and the academy (as if some attention paid to women's lives automatically meant a repudiation of the lives of men). Feminism's brave example stands as a living guide to all (men included) who would understand how their gender and sexuality are artificially constructed.

Breines, Wini, Young, White, and Miserable: Growing Up Female in the Fifties, Beacon Press, 1992
Brown, Lyn & Gilligan, Carol, Meeting at the Crossroads: Women's Psychology and Girls' Development, Harvard U Press, 1992
Brumberg, Joan Jacobs, The Body Project: An Intimate History of American Girls, Random House, 1997
Chernin, Kim, The Obsession: Reflections on the Tyranny of Slenderness, Harper and Row, 1981
Douglas, Susan J., Where the Girls Are: Growing Up Female with the Mass Media, Times Books, 1994
Ehrenreich, Barbara; Hess, Elizabeth and Jacobs, Gloria, Re-making Love: The Feminization of Sex, Anchor Books, 1987
Eyer, Diane, Mother Guilt: How Our Culture Blames Mothers for What's Wrong With Society, Times Books, 1996
Faludi, Susan, Backlash The Undeclared War Against American Women, Crown Publishers, 1991
Graham, Dee L.R. with Rawlins, Edna I. and Rigsby, Roberta K., Loving to Survive: Sexual Terror, Men's Violence, and Women's Lives, New York University Press, 1994
Greer, Germaine, The Whole Woman, Alfred A. Knopf, 1999
Hite, Shere, The New Hite Report-Women and Love: A Cultural Revolution in Progress, Alfred A. Knopf, 1987
Hite, Shere, The Hite Report On the Family: Growing Up Under Patriarchy, Grove Press, 1994
Hughes, Holly, Clit Notes, The Grove Press, 1996
Isaak, Jo Anna, Feminism & Contemporary Art: The Revolutionary Power of Laughter, Routledge, 1996
Levine, Judith, My Enemy, My Love: Women, Men and the Dilemmas of Gender, Anchor Books, 1993
Lord, M.G., Forever Barbie: An Unauthorized Biography of a Real Doll, William Morrow and Company, 1994
McQuiston, Liz, Suffragettes to She Devils: Women's Liberation and Beyond, Phaidon Press Ltd., 1997
Orenstein, Peggy (with the AAUW), School Girls: Young Women, Self-Esteem, and the Confidence Gap, Doubleday, 1994
Pipher, Mary, Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls, G.P. Putnam's Sons, 1994
Tanenbaum, Leora, Slut!: Growing Up Female With a Bad Reputation, Seven Stories Press, 1999
Thompson, Sharon, Going All the Way: Teenage Girls' Tales of Sex, Romance, And Pregnancy, Hill and Wang, 1995
Thurer, Shari L., The Myths of Motherhood: How Culture Reinvents the Good Mother, Houghton Mifflin, 1994
Warner, Marina, Six Myths of Our Time: Little Angels, Little Monsters, Beautiful and More, Vintage Books, 1994

HISTORICAL ORIGINS OF GENDER ROLES
Fact: Little boys are born male. Fact: Little girls are born female. “Boy” and “girl” are designators of the sex of individual children. Fact: Little boys are not born masculine. Fact: Little girls are not born feminine. “Masculine” and “feminine” are designators of gender. Gender is constructed, it is a sociological phenomenon. Many people confuse sex and gender. Many assume that how men or women act is an immutable fact of biology. “That's just how men are.” or “What else would you expect from a woman?” These and other statements reflect current, popular expectations, assumptions, “shoulds,” “shouldn'ts” and superstitions about what Real Men and Real Women are. The following books broadly explore how arbitrary and everchanging notions of appropriate gender are.

Dijkstra, Bram, Idols of Perversity: Fantasies of Feminine Evil in Fin-de-SiËcle Culture, Oxford University Press, 1986
Dijkstra, Bram, Evil Sisters: The Threat of Female Sexuality and the Cult of Manhood, Knopf, 1996
Gaylor, Annie L., Women Without Superstition “No Gods-No Masters”: Writings of Women Freethinkers of the 19th & 20th Centuries, Freedom From Religion Foundation, Inc., 1997
Gilman, Charlotte Perkins, Herland, Pantheon Books, 1979
Horn, M.A., ed., The Manual of Hygiene for “Father and Son”, Hygienic Productions, 1948
Goffman, Erving, Gender Advertisements, Harper & Row Publishers , 1979
Lerner, Gerda, The Creation of Patriarchy, Oxford University Press, 1986
Key, Wilson Bryan, Subliminal Seduction: Ad Media's Manipulation of a Not So Innocent America, Prentice-Hall, 1972
Odem, Mary, Delinquent Daughters: Protecting & Policing Adolescent Female Sexuality in the United States, 1885-1920, U-NC Press, 1995
Sappington, Rodney and Stallings, Tyler, ed., Uncontrollable Bodies: Testimonies of Identity and Culture, Bay Press, 1994
Schiebinger, Londa, Nature's Body: Gender in the Making of Modern Science, Beacon Press, 1993
Scott, George Ryley, The History of Corporal Punishment, Senate, 1996
Schur, Edwin M., Labeling Women Deviant Gender, Stigma, and Social Control, Random House, 1984
Shulman, Alix, To The Barricades: The Anarchist Life of Emma Goldman, Thomas Y. Crowell Company, 1971
Theweleit, Klaus, Male Fantasies: Vol. 1 Women, Floods, Bodies, History, University of Minnesota Press, 1987
Theweleit, Klaus, Male Fantasies: Vol. 2 Male Bodies: Psychoanalyzing the White Terror, Univ. of Minnesota Press, 1989

HEROES, PLANNERS, DREAMERS AND TROUBLE-MAKERS
These are people whose clarity, commonsensicality, audacity, courage, passion I admire. 

Bruce, Lenny, How to Talk Dirty and Influence People, Fireside, reprint 1992
Bruce, Lenny, The Essential Lenny Bruce, Ballantine Books, 1967
Crosbie, Lynn, ed., The Girl Wants To: Women's Representations of Sex and the Body, Coach House Press, 1994
Guerrilla Girls, Guerrilla Girls Greatest Hits, Pyramid Atlantic, 1993
Guerrilla Girls, Confessions of the Guerrilla Girls, Harper Perennial, 1995
Norgate, Sheila, Storm Clouds Over Party Shoes: Etiquette Problems for the Ill-Bred Woman, Press Gang Publishers, 1997
Peabody, Richard and Ebersole, Lucinda, ed., Mondo Barbie, St. Martin's Press, 1993
Pipher, Mary, The Shelter of Each Other: Rebuilding Our Families, Grosset/Putnam, 1996
Pollitt, Katha, Reasonable Creatures: Essays on Women and Feminism, Alfred A Knopf, 1995
Salaman, Naomi, ed., What She Wants: Women Artists Look At Men, Verso, 1994
Strohmeyer, Sarah, Barbie Unbound: A Parody of the Barbie Obsession, New Victoria Publishers, 1997
West, Peg Flandreau, Risking On Purpose, Essential Publications, 1991
Yohn, Tim, ed., Bad  Girls, © New Museum of Contemporary Art, MIT Press, 1994
Zahava, Irene, Hear the Silence: Stories by Women of Myth, Magic & Renewal, The Crossing Press, 1986

HETEROSEXUALITY IS GOOD. HOMOSEXUALITY IS GOOD.
Get used to it. It is a sad commentary that we can't even establish a minimum standard for how we interact with one another that guarantees that we won't kill one another. Most violence directed at heterosexuals is committed by other heterosexuals. Why don't we put our house in order first before we continue to throw stones? In a country where homosexuals are regularly killed by “normal guys,” it is a miracle that anyone can establish an identity that is true to themselves. Any two people who succeed against the odds and create a loving relationship should be celebrated. 

Berzon, Betty, Setting Them Straight: You CAN Do Something About Bigotry And Homophobia In Your Life, Plume, 1996
Champagne, Lenora, ed., Out From Under: Text By Women Performance Artists, Theatre Performance Group, Inc., 1990
Chase, Clifford, ed., Queer 13: Lesbian and Gay Writers Recall Seventh Grade, Rob Weisbach Books, 1998
Jennings, Kevin, Telling Tales Out of School: Gays, Lesbians, and Bisexuals Revisit Their School Days, Alyson Books, 1998
Katz, Jonathan Ned, The Invention of Heterosexuality, Dutton, 1995
Pharr, Suzanne, Homophobia: A Weapon of Sexism, Chardon Press, 1988
Rand, Erica, Barbie's Queer Accessories, Duke University Press, 1995
Renzetti, Claire & Miley, Charles Harvey, ed., Violence in Gay and Lesbian Domestic Partnerships, Harrington Park Press, 1996
Sears, James & Williams, W., Overcoming Heterosexism and Homophobia: Strategies That Work, Columbia U Press, 1997

ADOLESCENT SEXUALITY
For generations, parents haven't been comfortable with teaching their kids about sex. They avoided it. Too often, the sex they had was based on myth; filled with pain, guilt and dissatisfaction. Many of us learned their sex-hate. How do we help the next generation? Do we want to stand helplessly and watch as confusion and misinformation about sexuality is disseminated to our kids? Do we want taught a sexuality devoid of discussion of human relatedness and pleasure that which gives sex joy and reverence? NO! I'm 47 years old. The sex education I received consisted of diagrams stammeringly explained by embarrassed gym teachers. To this day, when I ask many students what, if any, their sex education entailed, it sounds to me as if it hasn't improved.
Let's teach kids about love and desire. We can teach a sexuality that is a vibrant, joyous, profound, mysterious, sweet, consentual, playful interaction, one where sex is integrated into a committed, long-term relationship; where both parties can assume a foundation of safety and are thus freed to genuinely explore themselves and each other and grow together.

Alan Guttmacher Institute, Sex And America's Teenagers, Alan Guttmacher Institute, 1994
Card, Josefina, Handbook Of Adolescent Sexuality & Pregnancy: Research And Evaluation Instruments, Sage Publications, 1993
Cassell, Carol, Sexuality Education: A Resource Book, Garland Publishing, 1989
Cook, Ann Thompson, Peer Education In Sexuality And Health, Y.M.C.A. Of The U.S.A., 1989
Donovan, Patricia, Testing Positive: Sexually Transmitted Diseases & The Public Health Response, Alan Guttmacher Institute, 1993
Feldman, Shirley, At The Threshold: The Developing Adolescent, Harvard University Press, 1990
Girls Clubs Of America Resource Center, Facts & Reflections On Female Adolescent Sexuality, Girls Clubs Of America, 1982
Greydanus, Donald, Caring For Your Adolescent: Ages 12 To 21, Bantam Books, 1991
Haas, Linda, Comprehensive Study Of Indianapolis Girls And Young Women, Alliance For Girls, 1984
Haffner, Debra W., Sex Education 2000: A Call To Action, SIECUS, 1990
Hayes, Cheryl, Risking The Future: Adolescent Sexuality, Pregnancy And Childbearing, National Academy Press, 1986
Hechinger, Fred M., Fateful Choices: Healthy Youth For The 21st Century, Hill And Wang, 1992
Herdt, Gilbert, Children Of Horizons: How Gay And Lesbian Teens Are Leading A New Way Out Of The Closet, Beacon Press, 1993
Howe, Neil, 13th Generation: Abort, Retry, Ignore, Fail?, Vintage Books, 1993
Ingersoll, Gary M., Adolescents, Prentice Hall Publishing Company, 1989
Moore, Kristin, Changes In Marriage And Fertility Behavior: Behavior Versus Attitudes Of Young Adults, Child Trends, Inc., 1989
Moore, Kristin, Policy Relevant Research On Teenage Childbearing: Potential Topics, Child Trends, Inc., 1987
National Guidelines Task Force, Guidelines For Comprehensive Sexuality Education: K-12 Grade, SIECUS, 1991
Ochs, Vanessa L., Safe & Sound: Protecting Your Child In An Unpredictable World, Penguin Books, 1995
Peterson, James L., Starting Early: The Antecedents Of Early Premarital Intercourse, Child Trends, 1985
Peterson, James L., Television Viewing And Early Initiation Of Sexual Intercourse: Is There A Link?, Child Trends, Inc., 1984
Voyanoff, Patricia, Adolescent Sexuality And Pregnancy, Sage Publications, 1990
Wilson, Pamela M., When Sex Is The Subject: Attitudes And Answers For Young Children-Suggestions For Teachers, Parents And Other Care Providers, Network Publications, 1991
Yondorf, Barbara, Adolescents And AIDS: Stopping The Time Bomb, National Conference Of State Legislatures, 1990

Zuirin, Stephanie, Best Years Of Their Lives: A Resource Guide For Teenagers In Crisis, American Library Association Books, 1992