Coming Home to a World Without Rape

“We are not even able to think adequately about the behavior that is at the annihilating edge. But what we think is less than what we know; what we know is less than what we love; what we love is so much less than what there is. And to that precise extent we are so much less than what we are.”

R. D. Laing, The Politics of Experience

Consent Rules!

No = No. If a partner says it, believe it. Otherwise you will be turning your potential lover into your victim. It isn’t someone else’s responsibility to set our limits. If someone doesn’t say “no,” it certainly does not mean “yes.” No answer does not = yes. Too many males have acted without good information (or ignored clear messages). If either (or both) of you can’t (won’t) talk about sex and the possible consequences for a relationship, then it is much too soon to be sexual together. Submission does not = consent. Reasons that females might submit include: fear experience might have shown her that resistance, verbal or physical, doesn’t work and may even be punished additionally; fatigue She may become tired of fending us off. If you ask and someone says “I guess” or “Well, if you want to” or...